My Top Ten New Year's Goals

Happy New Year!  With the New Year usually comes a list of resolutions that everyone is determined to keep…at least through the end of the month.  I have never subscribed to resolutions, because I pretty much know myself by now and know that I am not going to jog every day for the next year, or never drink soda again, begin juicing, or stop cursing like a sailor (when the baby is not around, of course).  But I think I should set some goals this year. 2013 was a terrible year for me and my little family, and we need to get back on the happiness track.  Here is a list I will do my best to stick to in this New Year (I received a lot of inspiration from ScaryMommy for this list):

1.      Live in the moment.  And no, I don’t mean YOLO it up like an idiot.  What I mean is, be present in my everyday life.  Notice the little things more and appreciate them.  When my 20 month old son is yelling “NOO NOOOO NOOOOOOOO” over an episode of Thomas the Train ending, try and not get angry that he is yelling over a tv program, and realize he is processing and professing his emotions…and that is a good thing.  When we are late for a doctor’s appointment because of ridiculous traffic, take the time to enjoy a sing-a-long with the little one.  Just basically enjoy my life as it is more and stop worrying so much about what is next or how I can make my life “better.”

2.      Stop calling myself fat.  Seriously, who is this helping, really? I don’t want my son to grow up hearing his Mom constantly worry about her weight or forever going through a new diet.  I know that how I project my self-esteem will largely affect how he feels about his own body and mind. 

3.     Practice what I preach.  If I want my little one to get outside and play more, than he needs to see me getting out and playing too.  If I want him to be a social butterfly, than he needs to see his Momma fluttering about a crowd happily.  This is hard for me, because I really am a homebody.  But I will do my best to reach out and make connections with friends and family that I haven’t “hung out with” in many years.  Plus, the little one needs some tiny tot friends, not just Thomas the f****** Train.

4. Stop being so “jelly” (jealous)!  I have an issue with comparing myself and my life with what others are doing or having.  I never seem to feel as if I am good enough or my life is complete enough.  I am always looking for more.  I need to straight up stop that nonsense.  My life IS full and my family IS complete.  I need to focus more on enjoying what I have and being happy with who I am.  This doesn't mean some character building is not needed.  Obviously everyone needs to continue growing and maturing as they age and experience new things.  But I need to follow rule #1 and be thankful for what I have accomplished thus far and enjoy it.

5. Don’t sweat the small stuff.  Is catching my son shoving a fistful of dirt in his mouth really reason to lose my shit and freak out on him?  No, not really.  I am fairly certain I have stuck worse things in my mouth (if you know what I mean) and lived to tell the tales.  Is my house ever going to be completely clean and all the toys where they should be?  No, definitely not.  And that is okay.

6. Take some time for myself.  I have morphed into super Mommy and I spend every waking (and most dreaming) moment worrying about my son and my husband and their happiness and well-being.  I need to put a portion of that energy into taking care of myself.  I need to drink more water.  I need to finally start that skin care regime I keep putting off for no good reason.  I need to slather on lotion after a shower.  Seriously…that takes like 2 minutes and I never do it.  I need to do my hair every day.  And I don’t mean, style it all fancy and junk every single day.  I just mean take the time to actually blow dry it to a somewhat manageable style.  I know this will make me feel better about my self-image and then I will have no excuse not to go to the park with the little one.

7. Eat healthier.  This does not mean a diet.  This does not mean a juice cleanse.  But if I want my son to grow up with a healthy relationship with food, he needs to see me eating healthy foods and snacks.  He eats what I eat.  Plus, I need to branch out from the same old dinner menu we have had for the last ten years.  I love tacos, but not every other night.

8. Sex it up.  Yup, this is where it gets awkward for my family who read this. Lol.  But I need to put a bit (okay, a ton) more effort into my sex life.  After having a baby who never slept, a serious bout of depression, living with the in-laws for many months, and a terrible time with the depo-shot that made me bleed every day for almost a year,  I have basically just pushed sex and anything related to the back of the bus.  Time to relocate sexy Jenny and put her to good use.

9. De-Clutter.  I have so much stuff. Let me rephrase that;  WE have so much stuff.  The husband, the little one, and I all have way too much stuff.  Stuff I don’t ever use and will probably never use, but that I hung on to….just in case!  No more.  Time to go through the house, room by room and get rid of what we do not use or need.  Get ready for one epic spring garage sale.

10. Write more.  I used to love to sit and just write.  I would write what was on my mind, I would write fanciful stories of elves and mutants, I would just write nonsense.  I miss it.  It was what got me through my younger days when I didn't yet understand that I was depressed…and not just kind of sad.  Whether it is blogging, journaling, or just writing a story for my son, I want to take the time to write.